song: secret valentine (shhh)
song: untitled
song: fish head killas

machinist
by george bush



hola amigo. my name is George Bush
ah. i was just going to ask who you are. how are you?

im fine. and you?
ok. i am being distracted from writing music

o well thats too bad now isnt it
but that is not unusual

so, what kindof music do you write?
lots of different things

such as?
specific genres?

well. hmmph. lets try this. as im sure that you are an acomplished composer
haha i wish

what is your favorite war composition ? u know... war music
the band war?

something from the 40's perhapse? ah, a vietnam history buff
um..no.

you think the gulf of tonken was actually propaganda?
really?

was america provoked to move in?
i am not knowledgeable about the gulf of tonkin situation

vietnam. its the excuse that we used to move in
i know that much

dont worry about it
oh ok. i remember, but that's probably all i know. anyway. music from the 40s

world war II
i like charlie parker a lot

really ?
yes

parker is swift
yes, quite

ever see the movie "The English Patient" ?
nope

hmm
i don't watch too many movies

ah. why do you think that the music doesnt jump like it used to back then?
hmmm...that's a good question

well then answer it
some jazz swings like that, but not often

its a harder state to achieve? i mean that... "jump"
maybe people are striving for something different other than that sort of "jumping" or "swing" as they called it. or we are looking in the wrong place

what are they striving for now?
a lot of hip hop carries that tradition. and funk. soul. james brown's music can really make ya "jump"

like a chicken! does an artist actually have to jump like a chicken to make the listener jump like a chicken? or can he simply will it into existance
sometimes its fun that way dont you think?

im george fucking bush how would i know?
one of my friends would like to know if you wear briefs.

i wear silk boxers
i think he means the legal or congressional sort

tell me about the writing process. where do you start from? go technical here...
my chair. from my brain it moves to my finger. the finger turns on the computer. then i go to sleep. i get distracted for a while. then i turn on some programs and make some noises. then i get distracted for a while. then i sequence some things and i get "on a roll". hold on one moment. i have another message.

sure. i'll be talking to rep. conyers
my friend is enquiring about underage lolita sex. i think he would like to ask you where he can get some.

tell him 15 will get him 20. usually a harsh state law
as well it should be

u know, i do these interviews as a service to you kids. i really am George Fucking Bush
i am indebted to you eternally

you are welcome
will this be read aloud on your weekly radio address?

i will have you know that im not as stupid as the media would like you to believe. erll. no. but i listen to vsnares :-) in the oval office even. even when everyone complains
sweet. he "jumps"

that he does. so tell us more about the creation process. you see the internet as the eternal distraction?
do you start mosh pits in the oval office with dick cheney and strom thurmond while listening to vsnares?

no. but they try and dance and its annoying
yes it is. but it is also a lovely well of information

what information do you seek on the internet?
everything

like?
a couple days ago i found out the characteristics of ammonia thioglycolate

how interesting. fill me in
yes and i get the news about your latest actions on the internet

what is ammonia thioglycolate ? ah. well what have i done lately? you think that i will raise enough to buy the presidency again?
it is a compound used in hair care products and also, some of its derivatives are used on pvc. perhaps you will

who is the strongest democrat who runneth against me? hillary?
she isn't running against you

Bull Graham? she isnt?
she does not plan on running anytime soon

i thought that she was
nope

no?
no

ah well i have heard that its still a year away. why is everyone so concerned so early this time???
i don't think there is a strong candidate to oppose you yet.
and yes it is still a year away. so let's wait and see

do you believe that i lied to the american people?
they are so concerned so early because you are so popular and have a nice head start. well as long as you are here, did you lie to your fellow americans?

yes. constantly. i have to
thank you. why do you have to?

i have to carefuly weigh the risks and advantages
i mean thank you for the answer. ah. and what are the advantages to lying?

let me put it to you this way: if the truth is uncertain, better kill them all just to make sure
ha. that is one way of looking at it. i'm sure many trrorists would agree with you

what terrorists? i thought that i got 43 thousand of them in afghanistan. there's a terrorist? where? show me
by "got" do you mean killed? i thought you were just denouncing the ones in israel a couple days ago?

yeah their time is up. taxpayer's money and all. time to kill of hamas. fuckem
didn't you just say there were no terrorists?

not anymore. HAHAHAHA! ever shot a gun?
i find you to be very inconsistent and contradictory. only paintball and water guns. i live in the city and i'm not in a gang, so i don't need a gun

ever been in a situation where someone tries to rough up your girlfriend?
no. have you?

well isreal is my girlfriend. ask again
haha sweet. you are quite a popular man then if the whole of israel is your girlfriend

you think that music reflects politics?
sometimes

when?
what sort of music would you make?

if i could make music?
would your music reflect your politics?

big band mucis
mucous? that's a lot of mucous. that's like all of glen miller's orchestra with a sinus infection

thats what the spit valve is all about
right! astute observation.

if you had a team of people what kindof music would you make?
if i had a team of people doing what?

reading this interview :-)
haha

what would you say?
if i had that, then i would make popular, awesome music. if i had a team of people playing instruments, i would make symphonies and score films

what if they were all addicted to heroin?
then i'm sure they'd be too busy with other things to be concerned with my music.

what kindof computer do you have ?
someone made it for me. i can give you the specs, but its not a brand. i need more RAM

why so?
it seems slow lately

lately?
especially when i am working with my photographs

and you think that ading rams will help?
i hope so

what software do you run ?
otherwise, i'll just leave it alone and delete some of my pictures and things. software? the things i like

operating system
windows 98

im sorry
how about you? are you a mac dude? or a windows dude?

i run a bash usually
bash?

not today because im having hardware problems so im on 98 as well
what is bash?

its from unix. Borne Again Shell?
nice. clever. unix and linux are nice, but i have not had good experiences with them

it has been a popular desktop in europe for the last 10 years with music programs as well
cool. i should do some research on it. is it stable?

there are very stable variants. i suggest BeOS. most rewarding and stable and useable www.bebits.com
oh i have heard of BeOS. i did not know it was based on unix

everything you need is there. its not... it just runs a unix shell among others
thanks for the link

do you think that bill gates wants your computer to work the same as professional gear?
i have no idea what he thinks. he just wants to make money, so if that'll make him money, then yes. but this bebits site looks cool. i am looking at the audio tools section

so, the networking industry vs. the music industry... which makes more money for billy boy?
networking industry of course

so why would he have a vested interest in hardware crippeling win32 so that it cant run any synths without a 23+ millisecond latency for half of its duplex?
i have no idea. that sucks. what do you think?

it was to finance demand for Korg, and Roland. you like Korg and Roland?
they do some good things.

you have the cash for that stuff?
i have to say that most of the non computer equipment i own is roland and boss. no i don't have the cash for pro roland recording gear, that's why i buy it all used and at a discount

what windows software do you use?
do you mean made by microsoft? i use the sound recorder that comes with windows

i mean any software
really though, if microsoft sabotages its own operating system files, instead of driving people to buy korg and roland, wouldn't it turn people toward the mac, since it is better designed for recording application?

bill owns 70% of the stock in apple corp. thats what he is banking on
really? where did you find that information?

were you paying attention when M$ bailed them out and re-installed Steve Jobs as the head of Mac??? oh... forgot. that was pre 9/11
thanks. yes. 9/11 erased my mind. i am now a robot. no. i forgot about microsoft bailing them out and i definitely did not know about bill gates retaining their stock

well not him personally you know. m$
right

which maintains that he only owns 30% and isnt the charasmatic leader and such. he's a technocrat
why wouldn't they just merge? there is other competition

there is but nothing seems to spark it short of all out government finance which will never happen. to subsidise the computer industry like that... no business of any ruling party
ok, since you know these things, i am curious; besides apple, does microsoft own any other computer manufacturing companies? or control, rather. since 70% technically is not ownership

well, it has its own in-house manufacturing shure. you certainly must remember the microsoft buss mouse
well what do they make, because i don't see any microsoft computers on the shelves. right, but i said computers

ah you have hit the nail on the head
i know that they make mice and joysticks

familiar with the term "wintell" ??? do you think that its a consortium?
it would make sense

that they are in bed together?
george, just so you know, i may have to leave soon

so soon? there is something that is intel based but M$ "makes" the XboX
okkkk

you arent angry about any of this?
sure

well what are you going to do about it?
well i'm not going to buy an xbox that's for sure

check out the XBEOX live CD there on bebits. its a full working distro of beos that runs from the bootable CD. about a 200mb download
for george bush, you sure do have some views that aren't very typical of a republican

ah but, republicans believe that the business world must fight it out for themselves. thats why i took that money from billy bou
right. billy bou?

boy. u know. fagboy gates. anyways... the hookers are here. time for my high school blowjob
ha. take some pictures for me

cant
no?

elections are less than 1.5 years dood!
incriminating evidence? yes. good

wait till im a lame duck
it will make you popular like bill clinton

not with the wifie it wont :-(
then people will call you "slut" instead of "dumbass". or "evil bastard"

evil is a relative term. i want you to live and make music. the sand niggers dont
thank you george. i do too. unfortunately i need a job to pay for health insurance. that's some awfully harsh language, george. not good for the votes

u never told me what sequencer you used
so, unless you want to pay for my health insurance, or unless you want to pay me to make music, i am stuck as a laboratory technician

stuck?
well, for now until i find another job

some people never make it past "fast food drivethru technician"
or i get paid to do something else. that's true george

be thankful
i am everyday. i don't get paid much more than the drive thru technician though. surprisingly enough

funny how wages are based on age discrimination?
perhaps

what u get paid to play an IDM gig nowdays?
i don't do any gigs. remember? i am not popular.

everyone gets gigs
actually i have done a couple gigs

how much?
i got paid about $15 i think

and when you are 45? how much will it be worth to you then?
its worth much more now. it all depends on what other people think its worth.

what sequencer do you use?
multiple sequencers

which are?
hardware or software?

both
and why do you need to know so badly?

because alot of IDM panzy ass fanzy kids will look at this bullshit and want to know
right. because they want to copy my style... uh huh

sure. what is it ?
well its not like i'm trying to keep a secret so who cares? tuareg, acid, cool edit, buzz, moonfish

whats your favorite Buzz machine?
i have not used it in a while, but i like the basic jeskola tracker. my copy is old

i have a hacked copy of buzz made by beetlebomb. has less start and aloada bugs
mine has no bugs

really?
why is yours hacked

alot of buzz is. you dont like the matilde tracker?
anyway, as the president, why are you using the word hacked? how do you have time to produce music? can i hear some of your tracks?

when i was younger perhapse. nowdays i have too much to do
right

perhapse my niece down in florida there. she uses buzz
but "younger"? what do you mean by that? oh ok. is your niece hot?

half spanish
spanish or cuban?

cuban
get it straight

whatever...
or you'll lose those votes

miami chicks
beotch

ask my brother
miami chicks? what about em? your brother is the man

that fathers her
i wish i could rig elections like him. my dad would be president. not my brother though

it was the North Florida republicans as a whole, not just him. he was just sitting back smiling the whole time. trust me
well of course. do you think one bush alone could do that?

as always its alot of people
he was just the manager in charge of that store. when will we see you in a gap commercial?

good idea. lemmie call artie (fliecher)
i think you would sell a lot of american flag tee shirts

i already have
no. i mean personally. as a spokesman for the gap

conflict of interest
i'll be right back

shure... i need to smoke a joint anyways
its spelled "sure"

whatever
come on georgie. lets go

u wanna fight me?
ha no. i wouldn't want to upset your mother.

lesgo punk. u see that fight last night? vlachenko v. lewis? its your fuckin interview u better start talkin
no. sorry. i was on the phone. i don't have cable and none of my friends do either

i see. that's terrible. boxing is like that howver..
i probably wouldn't have watched it anyway. its expensive. pay per view

not this time
no? what channel was it on?

for some reason it was only HBO
oh ok. i forgot that they had fights on that channel. i have never seen a boxing match

ever been in a fight? dont lie
hmmm...not really. a couple shoves or punches here and there. or words

well did you win?
no "real" fights. no winners

what is a "real" fight? blood and severe cuts?
multiple punches and scrambling. maybe a more violent version of that

people flying sideways with both arms pointed straight out holding a machete that gets burried into some soft american fat???
sounds like a scene from a movie

back to the sequencers
sure.

why u concider acid and coolpro to be "sequencers" ?
because i use them that way

with MIDI?
no

with the samples that they arrange?
i don't use midi because i only have one piece of hardware with midi function, so it would kind of be pointless

no MIDI? none?
i just said one piece. its my drum machine. but i just use that for other things

the roland one?
yes dr660.

what u use it for? details details
ideas. improvised music. my friends' rap music. my band that i've had recently

rally! how interesting. dry?
dry? effects?

no effects on it? yea. tell us
sometimes. sometimes delay or distortion. sometimes ring modulator. depends on what i am doing

an oldschool analog one?
i have one of those. i got it really cheap. its a dr110

no shit
its nice. i use it to trigger my juno60.



it has an analog trigger.
it makes a loud click triggered by the accent

wow, like a CV trigger. that's oooooold school
yes. 83

no shit
speaking of trigger, was he your favorite horse?

y yes. how informed of you
yes. i know weird things

you must be a blind cleric
no. just deaf

awesome
or def. whichever you prefer

oh shit... here come the manilla hackers yall... IEXPLORE caused an invalid page fault in module MSHTML.DLL at 017f:7ad32d6d. Registers: EAX=00000000 CS=017f EIP=7ad32d6d EFLGS=00010246 EBX=0191baf0 SS=0187 ESP=0058d7bc EBP=0058d898 ECX=00000000 DS=0187 ESI=00000000 FS=5b87 EDX=817b5a44 ES=0187 EDI=019792b0 GS=0000 Bytes at CS:EIP: 8b 41 1c 8b d0 c1 ea 04 f6 c2 01 74 06 d1 e8 83 Stack dump: 7ad47aa1 018b1610 7ae23a97 018b1640 0197af60 01979d10 00000263 00000000 00000000 00000263 000001df 00000000 018b21b0 0058d824 7ad33577 0058d81c
how sweet of you to liven things up like that

machinist website